A weekend blog entry will be a rare occurance round these parts. Usually I try to avoid the computer on the weekends like I would normally avoid the mall at Christmas. But hey, its Valentines Day. The big V. And whether you're head over heels in love or sitting alone in your rented storage garage cooking Kraft macaroni and cheese on a hotplate and watching reruns of Sanford and Son on your 8 inch black and white, you're affected by this day.
Lets face it...everyone wants to be loved. We don't know why we want to be loved, its just built into our programming...hardwired into our circuitry...for some folks its like a virus but I'll try not to go there. We all want to be loved whether its good for us or not. Love can be like a drug. It starts out and your flying high as a kite. You're soaring and your feet never touch the ground. But we all know what happens to things that go up.
They come down hard.
And the problem with alot of lovers is they get so caught up in the "honeymoon" period where everything your lover says is golden, where its cute the way he wears boxers with cartoon characters on it. Where its wonderful the way she purrs softly in her sleep. Where everything is downright freakin perfect and we dig and claw to keep it that way. But as time drags on those boxers aren't so damn cute anymore and you have to fight the urge to smother her with a pillow at night to stop that incessant snoring. You're positive the neighbors can hear her reving up her sinus engines at night and you're weighing the pros and cons of pre-meditated murder.
People are creatures of habit; WE HATE CHANGE. Most of us draw comfort in the repitativeness of our lives. Yet when it comes to relationships we run from repetativeness like the black plague. You wake up one day and suddenly its friday night and you're sitting at home watching TV, attempting to live vicariously through the latest Fox cleveage fest, just like you did for the last eighteen weeks.
So you begin to think, "hey, this isn't what I signed up for!" And rightly so. We all had bigger dreams...we wanted to be race car drivers or rock stars or deep sea divers or the cool guy on C.S.I. So when we realize that we're not gonna hit that mark we get resentful and who do we blame?
The ball and chain.
SHAME ON YOU (shame on me too...)!!!!
Today is a day about love. Its not about cards or candy or flowers or taking your girl/guy to Red Lobster for the Crab Fest and a couple bloody marys. Its about love. And the scary thing is that alot of us have lost sight of that. Many of us have found ourselves sitting on a proverbial island by ourselves where nobody understands what we're going through and there are no answers. The love has dwindled and yet we sit on our island praying for some sign. And the worst part about it is the answer is inside you. We don't have a blood-stained volley ball to scream at. We can't hold conversations with Wilson and expect him to talk back because the truth is we already know the answers.
On this day, here is what I want you to do (and this is a two-paragraph request separated into categories):
1. For the Married or Spoken For Cast-away: Think back to the first time you kissed your loved one. Take a close look at him/her and think about the very first time you told them "I love you" and how powerful it felt. Think about the last argument you had with your partner. Take a moment and just see how ridiculous that argument was. Think about the last time you watched her sleep or the last time you held his hand and how right it felt. It still feels that way, girls and boys, you just have to get on that shitty little homemade raft and get over the reef of resentment. You may have a few cuts and bruises afterwards...and yeah, Wilson might do a cannon ball into the drink but you didn't need that annoying bastard anyway.
All I'm saying is find the love...find the reason you fell in love in the first place and celebrate it if for only one day.
2. For the lonely person: Most of you are sitting here cursing this day. Cursing the fact that everyone has someone...except you. But maybe you do have someone. Maybe there is someone right in front of you and you just had your tunnel vision so cranked down that you couldn't see past the end of your nose. We are our own worst enemies and nine times out of ten we set our sights so high cause we know that its easier than getting hurt.
Open up your eyes, lonely person. Take a look around...there are a million other lonely people wandering the earth like zombies looking for brains. Take a freakin' chance. They all want to be loved just like you so stop thinking you deserve a brad pitt or a molly ringwald and start looking at the inside of people. And if you're that slob living in the storage garage, take a bath, wash your damn clothes and pick your head and smile. Don't get me wrong...i'm not reverting to some hippy free love fest, the last thing you need is the clap. I'm just saying that you're not as alone as you think you are.
So anyway, happy valentines day, have a good weekend. Maybe I'll see you at Red Lobster, but if you get in the way of my Crab Fest I'll cut you with my Valentines Day card!!!
posted by Michael Witmer @ Saturday, February 14, 2004
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